Everyone forgets. It is human to forget things occasionally. Even elephants forget. HOWEVER, if you have ADHD forgetfulness tends to occur more often. Sometimes it is forgetting where you’ve put something. Other times an ADHD sufferer forgets important dates or appointments. Most of the time this forgetfulness is bothersome but it can cause serious disruptions. I am trying to teach my 12 year old not to let it get out of hand but she is being stubborn.
I was very good at remembering things as a child and all my life until I bore children. I don’t know if it was natural or my fear of being hit by my mom that drove me to a steel trap memory but a lot of people depended on me for it because I did not waver. Now, after multiple failed pregnancies, two beautiful kids and menopause my brain ain’t what she used to be. STILL I remember more than my hubby or younger child. THAT should tell you how powerful ADHD is on the brain.
I try to be very understanding and patient but sometimes I just lose my cool. It is hard remembering for 3 people when your own memory is not that great anymore. Almost every day I hear, “Where is my key? Has anyone seen my phone? I need to buy a new “x” because I can’t find the old one. Oh, I forgot I had 1,000 of those – where did you find them? Mom, I can’t find my favorite ________ and I need it right now. I KNOW I put it right there – where did it go? etc”. The floor is a shelf and a trash can for these beautiful minded people. It can be frustrating to be their wife/mom/caretaker. Still, I must try to be more patient.
I love them so very very very much. I really do. I mean it. This is not sarcasm. HE is a brilliant software engineer and thanks to him we live a very comfortable life in a nice home and eat very well. I can take a year off from work and write at home (granted the pandemic helped with that too but I digress). SHE is an apt pupil who brings home straight A report cards EVEN WHILE being distracted constantly by memes and online comics. Both of them love fiercely and cry during sad parts in movies. They are funny and fun to be around. So, I feel awful for them when their memories fail them and I feel worse when my patience runs out.
So, when they forget I try to forgive. ADHD forgetfulness never goes away – just like my love for them. Hang in there all of you!