When Do We Figure Out Our Worth?

As women we are often made to feel like second class citizens. We are sometimes objects for lust or mothers to everyone. I do not know many women who grew up feeling empowered or comfortable in their skin. I am learning though, that later in life some of these women are finally figuring out who they are.

I’m one of those women.

For some of us it is our very inception that marks how we feel about us. If you were fostered, adopted, abandoned, passed on to relatives then you may feel unwanted and undeserving of love at times. It’s not an in your face realization either. That would actually be helpful. Sometimes it is pushed deep into our hearts and we are made to feel guilty about even thinking of feeling sad because we are so LUCKY to have been found, adopted, fostered and not aborted, killed or sold into sex slavery.

I’m one of those women.

So you overcompensate. You study extra hard into the night, practice your baton twirling, dance until you have blisters on your feet, get a degree and work endless hour at some career, have the cleanest, nicest kids on the block, work extra shifts and get those silly employee of the month/year “trophies” or whatever else gets you some sort of recognition. What is it all for? You want to find your worth. Whether it is subconscious or in your face, you want to feel you are worthy of this life.

I’m one of those women.

Somewhere on your journey you realized that you don’t NEED others to tell you that you are beautiful, smart, worth loving, capable, amazing or any slew of adjectives that describe women. Something happens in your brain and you wake up and say WAIT A MINUTE- WAIT A GODDAMNED MINUTE. I did not ask you to bring me into this world. My body is not something for you to desire and leer at. It is mine to do as I pease. I don’t have to prove anything to you. Like me or not I am here to stay.

I am one of those women.

Now, you take some time to allow your wounds to heal. Then you take a long deep breath. What made you stick it out? What made you not end your life even in the darkest times of your misery and heart ache? What made you finally get that you don’t have to have a shiny title or a big paycheck to be worthy of walking this earth and being a part of society? You finally figure out that you need no reason – you have worth because you ARE. You love yourself and find things that you enjoy being a part of to make YOU happy for once.

Finally. I am one of those women.

Published by bridgey1967

Loyal. Funny. Sensitive. Loving.

One thought on “When Do We Figure Out Our Worth?

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